Weddings may be a lot of fun, but marriage is not entirely a piece of cake. There is always the romantic moments just after a wedding when you both cannot seem to have enough of yourselves.
You call each other frequently, send yourselves short, lovely text messages every hour, and fall into each other’s tender arms and warm kisses at the slightest opportunity.
But then, marriage isn’t Disneyland and at some point, you are likely to encounter certain hiccups. Do not worry, however, as there are several marriage tips to see you through such tough times and solidify your marriage.
There is a whole lot of work that goes into making your marriage successful and happy. Whether you have been married for decades or are just recently married to the love of your life, there are several marriage tips applicable to every category.
There is also specific marriage advice for newlyweds to keep your marriage healthy and blissful. If you are wondering how to build a strong marriage, then you must be aware that it requires devoting time, energy, and effort to your spouse, irrespective of the length of your union.
Marriage takes work – hard work – and for you to reap the rewards, you have to do the work. There is no perfect marriage; every marriage has its fair share of ups and downs. There are also tough periods when stress and boredom kick in, and poor communication begins to put a strain on the relationship.
To keep your promise of living happily ever after and boast of a marriage that is romantic, fulfilling, and functional, you must keep an open mind, and be ready to adjust and adapt to necessary changes.
We have spoken to a host of relationship experts as well as undertaken tons of research to gather the best pieces of marriage tips to help you with this process. With these marriage tips, you can be assured of strengthening the bond in your relationship for years to come.
1. Sharpen Your Communication Skills
One of the foremost elements of a successful marriage is effective communication. It may appear trivial but communication sets the mood in a relationship.
Communication determines how lively, open, and healthy your relationship is. When you tell your partner everything that goes on in your life, including your little secrets, it helps keep the bond alive.
Most partners are often terrified when they hear these four words – we need to talk. However, it must be said that creating a thriving platform for healthy conversations is the best way to keep your marriage strong.
Communication is an interactive process that involves the active participation of both parties. By active, it means both parties are responsive speakers and listeners.
Active listening means that you are not distracted by other irrelevancies when your partner tries to express their feelings to you. Listening involves our hearts.
You must leave yours open, hear what he/she says, look at him/her while they speak, sometimes even paraphrase their statements. Too often, some partners are oblivious and do not realize that all their spouses need is someone who would listen to them. As such, make it your aim to prioritize effective communication in your relationship.
2. Always Take Responsibility
Taking responsibility for your actions falls among some of the most essential marriage tips. You must be ready to show maturity and growth by taking responsibility for your successes and failures, for your decisions and indecisions, and your wrongdoing if that is the case.
Taking responsibility is not as easy as it seems, particularly because humans generally try to absolve themselves of blame whenever possible, but it is one of the secrets on how to have a successful marriage.
When you and your partner argue, always remember to take responsibility for your actions. If you had said or done anything hurtful, insensitive, or derisive, recognize it happened during a heated moment and show maturity by apologizing. If you had done something to damage the feelings of your partner, try to restore their mood by owning up to your fault.
3. Never Take Each Other For Granted
Before getting married, you both must have shared a great deal of mutual love and respect for each other. However, once you are married for a length of time and seemingly comfortable, it is easy to begin to slip into a state of complacency, where you are confident in your partner’s position in your life and start to take them for granted.
Well, this is actually not rocket science. Part of our psychological make-up as humans is to get comfortable with what we have become familiar with.
Yet, you must endeavor to never allow your marriage to get to the point where you take your partner for granted by disrespecting their essence. You start to compare them with others and begin to find fault in their actions.
Rather than these, strive to respect your partner always. Do not make assumptions or comparisons about them, and when possible, offer to do nice things for them.
4. Keep Intimacy Alive
Seated comfortably among the habits for a healthy relationship is the need to prioritize intimacy with your partner. Intimacy is very important to a healthy marriage, however, ensure to set yourselves in the mood for it. When one party tries to force an intimate or romantic moment whereas the other party is uninterested, it only ends badly.
To keep your intimate life interesting, you could talk about what pleases you. You could also introduce some adventurous intimacy activities, fantasy role-playing, or bedroom props that may make the activity more exciting. Making out, though, isn’t all that matters.
You could get intimate with your partner through other actions like intimate hugs, holding hands, placing your arms over their waists or across their shoulders, and stealing kisses when you are out together.
5. Practice Full Acceptance
Always remember that you married your spouse for who they were then, and why they are now. Even if you want to change something about them and they aren’t bulging, you must learn to accept them the way they are.
Lack of acceptance leads to grudges in marriages and persistent nagging, especially on the woman’s part.
The key to a successful marriage lies in realizing that your spouse isn’t perfect and that when you’re consistently urging or persuading him to alter who he is, you are only focusing on his weaknesses or problems. Discard that mentality and begin to focus on and appreciate his positive qualities instead.
6. Go On Date Nights Together
You might have finally gotten married to your partner, but that doesn’t mean the romantic nights out must stop. Among the other marriage tips, this particular tip is the most overlooked by couples, especially those who have been married for a long time. Having a night when you spend time together helps strengthen the bond you share.
You also get the chance to ask yourself questions about your past, present, and future, and improve the romance in your relationship. Remember to starve off distractions by turning your phones off and putting them away while at it.
7. Compliment Your Partner Often
How often do you show you appreciate your partner by complimenting them? Simple words like “you look really beautiful today,” “I will never regret loving you,” and “you’ve got an amazing personality” are some nice compliments to give your spouse.
You could make the activity more romantic by writing these sweet words in notes and placing them where they are most likely to find them.
8. Stay Off Fantasies
It is important that you keep your marriage expectations realistic and not fall victim to the fairy tale stories on display on social media, else you would be bracing yourself for disappointments.
You can live a regular, normal life and still be happy. Do not create mental fantasies that you want to fulfill with your partner. This is one big lesson if you’re wondering what makes a marriage successful.
9. Be Willing To Forgive
Couples aren’t perfect. There are bound to be rough moments in the relationship when you go into bitter arguments with your partner and resort to throwing tantrums and angry words at your spouse. Oftentimes, the wronged party feels slighted and decides to fuel the feud further by keeping to themselves.
While this is simply down to human nature, always endeavor to settle arguments quickly. Display a sympathetic spirit by forgiving your partner fully, especially when they have shown they are sorry for their actions. A marriage that thrives on bad blood is unhealthy and will definitely not last long.
10. Never Threaten Divorce
Never threaten to get a divorce if you are not ready to go through with it, never. Some couples are fond of making threats about seeking a separation during fights, but the truth of the matter is, those words are hurtful and will irreparably affect the energy and fire in your relationship.
Additionally, divorce threats are immature, paint you as a weakling, and do not give off the vibes of confidence and composure. So don’t ever use this strategy as a device for solving marital problems.
11. Deepen Your Attraction To Each Other
Attraction goes deeper than physical looks, and you can intentionally decide to get attracted to only your partner. As a certified life coach, Sunny McMillan notes “Attraction to your spouse is a decision that you have the power to make throughout your marriage.”
Learn to focus on the appealing features of your partner, do not allow external doubts and distraction creep in, and while at it, strive to build a mental connection with your partner that reaches deep within. All these conscious actions will go a long way in deepening the attraction you feel for yourselves.
12. Celebrate Little But Great Moments Together
While it is important to be there for your partner during the hard times, it is equally important to acknowledge the good times also. It doesn’t have to be a momentous achievement for you to savor the moment with your partner.
Celebrate their little wins, using the moment as an opportunity to solidify the love you have for yourselves. By doing this, you would be showing gratitude for the special moments in your marriage.
13. Do New Things Together
One of the most important marriage tips bordering on spicing your marriage is doing new things together. Boredom is a serious issue for married couples, especially older ones.
As such, you might want to take time to inject new activities and interests into your relationship that can help you maintain and improve your marital bond.
You can make your routine more unpredictable. Go on surprise day trips, do an activity together, or plan a vacation to somewhere you’ve both wanted to go. Whatever it is you do, make sure they are exciting, fascinating, and memorable.
14. Always Keep Your Partner’s Secret
When your spouse confides in you, it shows that have implicit trust in you and this is not something to take lightly. Even if the secret they have shared with you appears small and insignificant, you do not possibly know the weight it holds to them. As such, you must respect their trust by not revealing their confidential secrets to your friends or family members.
The issue of revealing family secrets to third parties or external bodies have caused a strain in many marriages. So, you must recognize what is important to your partner and refrain from discussing the same with your close circle.
15. Be Willing To Change And Adapt
For couples in marriages to be truly happy together, they must be willing to grow, change, and adapt. Life is dynamic, people are growing, needs are changing, interests are expanding, and relationships evolve.
For this reason, it is important, first as humans and then as marriage mates, to be adaptable and adjust to obtainable situations. Something of grave importance to us today may hold lesser value to us tomorrow. To forestall any friction in the relationship, we must learn to grow with our spouse and support each other always.
Successful or stable marriages do not simply come about. They are products of deliberate efforts and require regular maintenance and management. These marriage tips explored above are designed to strengthen marital bonds and will deliver profitable, healthy results if adhered to.
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