If you are in a relationship, but you are feeling alone. You feel like your partner is not interested anymore. You feel like it’s time to move on.Years ago, I was stuck in this relationship with my ex-boyfriend. Certain things I didn’t like kept repeating even when I complained and talked it over with him, but I comply whenever he tells me he doesn’t like one or two things; I decide to work on it.
But in my case, he just can’t. My guts were telling me it is time to move on, it is time to let go. But I was held back with this fantasy, he will change. I kept making excuses for him. Not until, it began to weigh me down mentally, physically, and emotionally. I had to do the needful which was to end the relationship and move on.
It wasn’t easy because of the years invested but it was relieving not to carry the weight of all the toxic emotions and him not just paying attention and refusing not to do anything about it to change. I found PEACE!
Are you currently in a relationship that seems like it’s not going anywhere, it is time to let go and move on.it’s not going to be easy deciding to call it quits but you have to do what’s necessary.
I’ll be hinting on the signs I saw in my past relationship I earlier referred to. When these things start to happen, probably it’s happening already in your relationship. Then it is time to leave.
Here are 12 signs to know it is time to let go and move on from a relationship
1. Are You The Only One Making The Effort To Make Things Work
A relationship is ideally two persons coming together in love to make what they share last and work. Though there are times you can take the 80% when your partner is not available because of some reasonable reasons.
But here it is different, if you constantly find yourself, you are always put in that position of being the only one working for the success of the relationship and your partner is comfortable. Then it is time to move on. It is time to let go.
2. Do You Still Get Intimate With Each Other
Intimacy is one of the core necessities in a relationship. Now I’m not even referring to making out. there are other intimate moments, intimate acts you can share with your partner asides from making out. There are ways to touch your partner’s soul that don’t necessarily involve intercourse.
For example: spending quality time with your partner, laughing with them, feeling like they got you, feel wanted, smile at them when your eyes meet, admire them, support them, hold them close and tell them you love them, and so on. If the only intimacy you get is just sensual then there is a fault with the relationship.
It feels like a chore or something you just have to do to keep the relationship going. You have to ask yourself some personal and deep questions and know that it is time to let go. This singular act shows you do not mean anything to your partner except the person they can go to when they need to satisfy their sensual desires, and you can’t refuse because you want the relationship to keep going. You end up being manipulated.
3. Do You Always Feel On The Edge
Are you feeling like you do not have to do certain things you usually do, because if you do? Your partner will get mad or break up with you. Your actions are narrowing down to only what you feel will make your partner happy but leaves you miserable. These things are what you don’t do on a normal day when the going was good.
For example, your partner wrongs you, he is supposed to be the one to apologize, acknowledge he did wrong. But no, the reverse is the case: you go ahead to apologize for even getting angry, just so you don’t get on his nerves. This is very unhealthy.
Because you will end up sweeping so many important things under the carpet. You are enduring so many things, you are not supposed to. Things that can be talked about and worked on.
4. Is The Relationship Bringing More Pain Than Happiness
Your partner is supposed to make you happier, not happy. Do you see yourself living in past glory, the happy moments you had, and not have in the relationship? If you constantly feel frustrated, lamentations, cry, upset, pained, what if’s more often than not.
How do you feel when you think about the relationship? You just know you are not being treated right. Then just know this person might not be the right person. The person you love is supposed to bring happiness and joy when we think about the relationship and not sadness.
5. Are You Hanging On Past Memories
Just like the previous sign, if you only have to relive the good times spent in the past to assure yourself your partner loves you. You use these memories to convince yourself that your partner loves and cares about you. Then there’s a problem. A healthy and Real relationship doesn’t live on past memories but consistency.
6. Are you Justifying Their Actions
You know something is not right, you just know “oh your partner is not supposed to act or talk to you in a certain manner. Instead of seeing the wrong, you end up justifying his actions. You come in different colors of explanations to justify it. So you can feel good about whatever it is that happened. You don’t just want to see that they are wrong.
7. When An Issue Keeps Reoccurring
You have tried to endure, let it slide more than often, you complain, and compromise about an issue just to make it work. But your partner keeps repeating the same act. It is said that one time is a coincidence, the second time is a second chance, but a third time, obviously something is wrong.
If he or she keeps doing those things you have complained and talked about it over and over again. Then, just know they are never going to change or stop it even though it is hurting the relationship. If it’s not something you can live with, then leave.
8. Do You Feel Obligated
Probably, the relationship has lasted for many years, unconsciously you now feel like it’s him or her forever and no one else. A healthy relationship is not measured by the number of years both of you have been together, or wait maybe you feel you have invested a lot of time and effort to just walk away because that’s exactly my thoughts when I was with my ex-boyfriend i talked about.
You are feeling a sense of entitlement like you must reap the fruits of all the years invested.
Hey! If your needs are repeatedly trampled upon like it’s nothing. Then the relationship isn’t worth your time.
“When it comes to people and relationships, time does not necessarily equal success”.
9. Are You Involved In Their Plans
A partner who is interested in you and the relationship includes you in their plans. You are now a part of their life, therefore you should be included in their plans. Check it when they continually make plans and don’t include you.
10. When Arguments Occur More Than The Ordinary
Argument is part of what makes up a healthy relationship. Arguing with your partner is a normal thing. But when an argument is now the order of the relationship. Both of you seem not to just agree on anything. Both of you argue over trivial things. It probably means both of you can’t be compatible.
11. Are You The One Compelling Them To Tell You “I Love You”
I know they say love is action, not words. But you can’t equally be in love with someone and not voice it to them often. It’s not something you should be reminded of. I love it when my boyfriend tells me “I love you”, especially in unexpected moments. It’s a beautiful feeling.
Now imagine when you are the only one saying the “I love you’s” but not getting a positive response and you end up asking for it. It drains you emotionally. But then, if you have to make someone say “I love you” to you all the time. It sounds simple but something is wrong.
Bonus Tip:
When you are scared to question some of his bad characters that is hurting you and the relationship. You can’t just bring yourself to question him, to ask him about stuff you aren’t comfortable about, or in some situations tell him you can’t just tell him your mind freely.
You always resort to laugh, smile, and say “I’m fine”. You shouldn’t be scared to tell your partner how you feel, because when you are in a relationship; we always care about the feelings of who we are dating. To adjust when necessary. When this feeling is there, it translates to that you are scared of your partner. The big question is “ why are you still in the relationship where you are scared of the one you love”.
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