9 Reasons Why Flirting In A Relationship Is Cheating

Sharing is caring!

Is flirting cheating? This question probably nags at the back of the mind of someone trying to flirt with another person who isn’t their partner.

Or even with one who is not sure how to feel about their partner flirting with another person. Here the need to know if the act is entirely harmless arises, so you’d know if your partner has wronged you by flirting with another.

The need also arises with the flirting partner because you wouldn’t want to sabotage your relationship for a few moments of excitement if it turns out what you’re about to do isn’t right.

Doesn’t the initial hesitation give away much? If flirting is so harmless, why stop to think about it and not just go ahead? On the other hand, would you say that flirting is cheating and not reading too much meaning into an innocent action?

Why would anyone be annoyed their partner flirted with someone else, as long as they didn’t take it further than that? Isn’t flirting supposed to be fun?

These questions are essential to understanding what flirting is and what people perceive it to be. On the other hand, it is also important to take into consideration how the other party involved (your partner) feels about the whole situation.


What Is Flirting?

Flirting is any body language that communicates a romantic or sensual interest without a corresponding action cementing or accompanying such behavior. It is rather suggestive and conveys an attraction and amorous interest.

Flirting can be done in many different ways, as long as it fulfills the purpose of being romantically suggestive. Both men and women flirt, but they flirt in different ways.

For example, men flirt in a confident and subtly cocktail manner that suggests strength, self-worth, and appreciation of the person they are flirting with.

Women, on the other hand, are coy in their approach. Flirtation by women usually comes in the form of slightly exaggerated feminity, just enough for the person they’re flirting with to be aware of and appreciate their womanliness.

Some other category of women takes a more confident approach to flirtation like the male folk. It often depends on the personality of the person they are flirting with.

If it is perceived that the other party is attracted by feminine strength, the flirtation will take a ‘superwoman’ approach. This type of approach communicates femininity that is resilient rather than docile.

Questions about what constitutes flirting and what does not are asked regularly, and many want to know when flirting has crossed the limits; hence the question, is flirting cheating?


Harmless Flirting Examples

  • Light touches on the arm or thigh.
  • Blowing a kiss.
  • Winking.
  • Licking of lips.
  • Stroking of beards.
  • Stroking the person’s hair.


Is Flirting Cheating In A Relationship?

Many consider flirting to be cheating and would not take it lightly with a partner who acts this way.

They see it as outright disrespect that a person would be in a relationship with them and yet flirt with another.

For them, it is a prediction of what is to come, that is, an outright act of cheating. This category also believes that an affair doesn’t start with physical intimacy but from the mind or emotions.

Therefore, they think their partner is already cheating by investing their emotions in kindling attraction from someone else.
However, others view it differently. They will not consider flirting as cheating unless it escalates and results in physical intimacy with the other person or if the flirtation becomes heavy and highly suggestive.


Is Flirting With Someone Cheating?

Is flirting with someone cheating? To determine if you’re cheating when you flirt, you must understand your motive for flirting.

For instance, if you meet someone you could be attracted to if you weren’t already committed, there might be an urge to explore what that attraction might amount to without sabotaging your current relationship.

Flirting offers an effective way to do precisely this, but its harmlessness is questionable. With flirting, you can engage in suggestive body language and communication and enjoy the thrill of the same being communicated back to you.

The thin line that seems to separate flirting from cheating, in this case, is the absence of physical intimacy, but emotionally, affections have obviously shifted or are at least divided. In addition, flirting is usually the precursor to cheating if the goal is to get right at physical intimacy.


Is Flirting Cheating When You’re Married?

One may wonder, in a situation where you’re married, is flirting cheating? It may not be a big deal when you’re not in a committed relationship. However, if you’re committed to a marriage, things would be seen from a whole new level and perspective.

First, you pledged to forsake all other romantic interests and focus on your partner. All the energy used in flirting can and should be channeled to spicing up your relationship. So, yes, flirting is cheating when you’re married.


Is Online Flirting Considered Cheating?

The comfort social media offers is that we can do whatever we want and be whatever we want without necessarily stepping out of the shadows. We can say whatever we wish to without minding boundaries and the restrictions that meeting physically presents.

Under the guise of social media, things can quickly turn for the worse because it is a secret corner that does not offer checks like being in the open does.

Sinister plans are undoubtedly hatched in secret, and this is no different. Because you could literally be in the same room with your partner and yet be exchanging scandalous messages with another person, it just makes it easier to slip into cheating so quickly.

There is a fast blur between online flirting and cheating because they can quickly become the same in no time at all.


Is Facebook Flirting Cheating?

Flirting with someone you don’t know and may never see is even more enticing than regular face-to-face flirting. This is because you can hide your identity online without worrying about being discovered or exposed.

That kind of mindset could flatter you into thinking that you could go much farther than just flirting without being caught too. Facebook is a perfect place for something like this to take place.

There are many people you can start a conversation with on the platform, and you can slip into an easy friendship with a stranger. But, soon enough, things can go downhill from there.

So, is flirting on Facebook cheating? Very likely, because just like every other online platform, you can quickly go from flirting to cheating in minutes.


Is Text Flirting Considered Cheating?

You obviously wouldn’t flirt over the phone if your partner were present and aware. Anything you would do in the such likeness and wouldn’t want your partner to know or find out strongly leans towards cheating.

If you’re flirting in the open, it’s easy to escape the cheating label because body language signals may be subtler forms of amorous suggestion.

But to properly communicate that you’re flirting, you may have to be more assertive if you’re texting so that the other person can understand without confusion what you’re trying to do.

Since you have to communicate your interest heavily, it can easily be misinterpreted as more than you bargained for.

In no time, you find yourself making arrangements that a person in a relationship has no business making. In this scenario, then, is flirting cheating? It could as well be because of text flirting; it’s a slippery-slope descent to cheating.


Is Jokingly Flirting Cheating?

When someone is jokingly flirting, it’s different from when one is flirting with an end goal in mind. Jokingly flirting is dangerous because it does not have an end goal.

And without an end goal, there will be no boundaries or restrictions, and it may spiral out of control, as most flirting are wont to do.

When there is no purpose to a thing, abuse is inevitable. One can unknowingly overstep their boundaries with flirting if they don’t have restrictions in the first person. Soon enough, suggestive jokes will start to fly, and that in itself is going too far already.


9 Reasons Why Flirting Is Questionable In A Relationship

1.  You Give Someone Else The Attention You Should Give To Your Partner

Flirting involves targeting and paying amorous attention to someone, which in this case, is not your partner.

This can be problematic because flirting with another person creates an illusion of novelty, which tricks one into staying glued to this new catch, intending to glean as much thrill and excitement from the experience as possible.

This may take a toll on how you relate with your significant other. You’ve probably been with them for a while, and the novelty of falling in love with them has settled into a mutual love agreement to work towards moving the relationship forward.

You probably don’t know much about the person you’re flirting with, and the less you know, the better because the mystery of not knowing heightens the pleasure of flirting.

In this way, the other person you’re flirting with would manage to snag the attention you should be giving to your partner and channel it to themselves without lifting a finger.

Watch for when the thrill of flirting with another draws your focus away from your partner far too often. This is a sign that you need to tone it down before it becomes more than a little friendliness.


2.  It Could Lead To Actual Cheating

In all honesty, flirting can get really heated and intense between the parties involved. In that case, the question would be, is flirting cheating?

Judging by a broad scale of what people think cheating is, a little flirting here and there doesn’t hurt anybody. But it can potentially hurt both the persons involved and their partners.

Flirting, like every other similar exercise, rarely remains stagnant. If left unchecked, it only becomes worse and grows on a person right under their nose.

Soon they are entertaining ideas that they wouldn’t have thought about before. Ideas that are undoubtedly disloyal to their partners would be considered cheating.

Since flirting, which has escalated to this point, is usually kept under wraps, it is unchecked until it becomes full-blown cheating. Eyelashes batted coyly, and suggestive smiles soon become tumbling in the sheets. Before you know it, you’re cheating on your partner.

3.  It Is Disrespectful

For many, flirting is a harmless exercise, and I see nothing wrong with it. This category of people could flirt with another in the presence of their significant other without batting an eyelid or feeling guilty. However, while some overlook this behavior, others find it downright disrespectful.

When you first see another person, especially in your partner’s presence or in the company of people who know your partner, it sends an immediate and damaging message. It gives off the air that you have no respect for your partner and that they are being used in the relationship.

Even if your significant other sees nothing wrong with it, you’d be better off not flirting than flirting with someone else and embarrassing or humiliating them.

People easily interpret such behavior as openly and brazenly cheating on their partner. They’d see your partner as weak and helpless and you as disrespectful, and that doesn’t bode well for any of the parties involved.


4.  It Causes Issues In A Relationship

Very few people can stand their partner openly flirting with another person, whether in public or not. It can appear disrespectful, hurtful, and unkind to put them through such an experience.

It can also cause many problems in the relationship, including a lack of trust, disloyalty, and betrayal. This arises if the flirting partner finally succumbs to the sensuality of their actions and cheats with the person they’ve been flirting with.

It can also cause you to be dissatisfied with your partner. Because the person you are flirting with creates a novel experience for you, the thrill of chasing and being chased gets exciting and can make you view your partner as boring.

Your emotions contrast these adrenaline-packed moments you enjoy during the flirtation with your partner’s calm, loving atmosphere, which grows increasingly monotonous and boring in this light. You might even resent your partner’s company and refrain from staying longer than necessary around them.

Flirting with another can get you to the point when you no longer give your partner the attention that you used to provide them with. Your partner is bound to notice, and the reason for your attitude towards them will hurt them even more.

All of these will indeed cause issues and put a strain on your relationship. If with flirting, you can do all the damage to your relationship that would equally be achieved by cheating, one can’t help but conclude that flirting is indeed cheating.


5.  It Could Lead You To Become Secretive And Dishonest

If you enjoy the thrill of flirting, yet you are not sure how your partner would react to it, you might take to doing it behind their back rather than give up the fun you’re having.

Flirting can be addictive and promptly suck a person into acting out more flirtatiously with time. Even if they are unsure how their partner would feel about it, they’d rather keep it a secret than tell their partner.

This is because they’d rather not risk their partner disapproving of the behavior and because they don’t want to give up flirting.

So instead of finding out and being disappointed, they don’t disclose the matter and even go to the lengths of dealing with their partner dishonestly. All these are to protect and preserve a behavior that thrives even more in secrecy.

In situations like these, people are caught up in affairs, lured in by their flirtatious behavior, and unable to untangle themselves from the mess they have made.

Even if you think flirting is harmless, if it leads you to become secretive and dishonest towards your partner, it’s probably harming your relationship more than you think. This is where you should draw the line.


6.  It Could Lead You To An Unhealthy Comparison Between Your Partner And The Other Person

New experiences promise a fresh perspective and offer one something unknown or unexplored to be fascinated about.

This is the same with meeting someone else after you have already been in a relationship. Even if you love your partner, a new person around the corner will surely spark your interest.

Our feelings are often misleading and would convince us to leave the comfortable and satisfying world we know in pursuit of the possibility of a better one that is yet unknown. This happens when you continuously flirt with another and allow yourself to be entranced and fascinated by the situation.

Soon you’ll begin comparing your partner with this person. You’ll point out the human faults of your partner that you’d lovingly overlooked previously and measure them against the allure of this new person and the good side they allow you to see.

When you compare your partner with another, your relationship starts to take a bad turn. You’ll never be satisfied with whatever your partner does, as you used to, because of this new situation you’ve created by flirting with another person.


7.  It Leads To Emotional Dependency

Emotions can be unpredictable and volatile and should be handled with wisdom and logic.

This is because even though you have feelings for your partner, and they return them, there are times when things won’t be so rosy between you two.

Then it would take reminding yourselves why you are together in the first place and the maturity to reach out and make things right.

When flirting with someone else, it’s easy to abandon this sound process and logical train of thought and instead seek emotional support and fulfillment in that person.

Flirting is rarely harmless nor without sensual motive. It is highly suggestive, and language communication during flirtation cannot be mistaken.

If you fall into that trap, you may find yourself seeking emotional solace from this other person you have built amorous energy, which can have devastating consequences on your relationship.

First, you’d be getting validation from someone other than your partner, which will automatically make you drift apart emotionally, then physically. So, if you ask us, “Is flirting cheating?” we will say yes.


8.  If You Flirt With One, Who Says You Won’t Flirt With Others?

You may call it harmless, but the act of flirting itself can quickly escalate if not kept in check. It may seem like nothing when it’s just with one person, and it’s hardly a repeated occurrence.

Putting this question in a smaller context may not seem like much, but when allowed, flirting can become a thing of habit. It’s no longer you trying to justify a little flirtation with one person.

Instead, it becomes a thrilling game of fun you’d play with just about anybody. It is also a behavior that doesn’t just widen in terms of the number of people you flirt with but also the intensity of flirtation.

There is no assurance that you won’t flirt with another or many other people once you flirt with one person.

A wrong definition of flirting and erroneously perceiving it as harmless would do that to a person, making them think it is okay to do it with anybody. This attitude is unhealthy for any relationship.


9.  You Feel Guilty

Many people would never flirt in the presence of their significant other. They feel like they’re doing something wrong. So they do it discreetly, even heightening the thrill of flirting with another.

Being caught in this act by their partner is not something they want to experience. In addition, feelings of guilt settle on them after the thrill of the moment is gone. Why would anyone feel guilty about flirting, as though they cheated on their partner? Or is flirting cheating?

If you feel guilty after you’ve flirted with someone other than your partner, then there’s something off with how you’ve behaved.

You might have acted in a way that betrayed your partner’s trust and loyalty. To avoid feeling this way, it’s best to avoid flirting with people.



There is usually an unspoken rule of fidelity in every romantic relationship. Still, we often fail to define the lines of what would amount to cheating in case of such an occurrence.

That’s why the big question is, ‘Is flirting cheating?’ People want to know what they can and can’t do with others outside of their relationship and how far they can go before it becomes too far.

This article, ‘Is flirting cheating? – Everything you need to know answers all these questions and clears the confusion surrounding this topic.

Sharing is caring!

Sharing is caring!

Author: Relationship Culture

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published.